| HUMOUR
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ALTERNATIVE COLLIE STANDARD |
| The Collie: |
....can best described as an intelligent,
courageous, beautiful elegant working show dog, with the style of a fashion model, the build of an Olympic
athlete, and the brains of a genius - all of which tell us nothing at all about the dog. |
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Head: |
....the collie head is of great importance - without it the dog loses all
expression, and bumps into things. Dogs without heads should only be shown under all-rounder's.........specialists tend to notice this
failing. |
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| Muzzle: |
....this is something else that all collies should have. It should start below his eyes and finish at
his nose, and should not be too pointed, or the judge may mistake the dog for a
Saluki, or too heavy and strong, in which case it might win the Golden Retriever
Classes. |
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| Teeth: |
....teeth should be
white, and should not stick out too far, or in too much. If they get grey
or dirty yellow, a mixture of sand and Ajax, applied with a wire-brush will get them
sparkling white in no
time. It may make the gums bleed, but there is nothing in the standard about bleeding
gums.
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| Eyes: |
....the eyes should be
open, and there should be two of them. They should both look in the same
direction. If they don't, train the dog keep them shut. |
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| Ears: |
...again there should be
two, one on each side of the head, but they should not to be too large that
a gust of wind could lift him off the ground. Dogs with too small ears at
all, may have difficulty in hearing. |
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| Neck: |
...the neck should be
long, strong and arched, preferably at the head end of the body, as there is a
proper misconception that the neck is meant to join the head to the body. Dogs without necks may suffer
from malnutrition due to difficulty in transferring food from the mouth to the stomach region.
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| Legs: |
....the collie should have four legs, one at each
corner. They should be long enough to reach the ground. If they don't you have a problem. It is also desirable to have
all four legs the same length, otherwise the dog will walk with a tilt. People who live on hillsides
occasionally find that their dogs have two legs on one side a bit shorter than the other side. The only
solution to this problem is to move to lower, flatter ground. At the end of each leg there should be a
foot. Dogs with feet going in the opposite directions have a problem, as this is a very difficult fault to
correct. |
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| Body: |
...the body connects the front of the dog to the back. Dogs without bodies should not be shown or bred
from. Dogs with bodies too low to the ground also have problems, especially
nursing
bitches. |
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| Tail: |
....all collies should have a
tail, and it should be at the opposite end to the head. For this reason it is marked with a white tip, to enable owners to differentiate between head-end and tail-end at feeding
times |
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| Temperament: |
...the collie must never by shy, sullen or growly, except when the bill collectors
comes round.
Biting a judge, even when justified as when being put in second place, is frowned upon. Biting stewards is
quite permissible, however as these are normally replaceable. |
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| Colour & Markings: |
...the collie may be black, red, white, blue, yellow or any combinations of these
colours, but it must be remembered that there is a bias amongst the judges, who keep putting up sable,
black or grey ones, with white collars. However, if you have one of the other colours, wait until a
specialist judge producing the same colour collies as your own is judging, as he will be an expert and
recognise a good collie when he sees one. |
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| Disqualifications: |
....any artificial means used to deceive the judge e.g. artificial limbs, false teeth,
glass eyes, or glued-on coats (especially if this comes off on handling). Also having one,
when there should be two or three or none at all. Bitches should be trained to look
unconcerned. |
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| Faults: |
...no Collie has any faults worth mentioning |
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author unknowing
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